The Magic in Showing Up

For over 20 years I’ve been a clown.

Every year I’ve pulled on my candy striped socks, my baggy patched bloomers, held up by my rainbow suspenders, the brightest t-shirt with “My Name is Awesome” emblazoned on the front and then of course my pink satin jacket.

Am I trained as a clown, have I been to clown school? No AND a resounding YES!

Do they teach you at clown school that you will have things thrown at you, that kids will pull your tail made of pompoms and that some will almost have a panic attack at the sight of your painted face. Oh and while we are on the subject of face paint would clown school teach you how to breathe so as to stop yourself from itching that spot under your caked-on white face.

All these skills come from showing up again and again.

Why is this story in my blog posts? What prompted me to write about skills based training and showing up?

Recently I received an “innocent” text from a client asking me -

Do you have any qualifications in what you do?

I’m ashamed to say when I read it I literally threw my phone aside skittering across the lounge chair like something hot and distasteful. Instant reaction, instantly angry, instantly defensive. I know why - it’s the inner critic and the imposter within that judges me plus an unhealthy , or perhaps healthy, regard for being ostracised and heralded as a witch in this life and countless others.

So what is my intention for writing and reflecting on my qualifications.

The magic is in the showing up. What qualifies me to do the work I do?

When I distill the answer it is, that I have lived experience of having survived and thrived through trauma, personal growth and conscious spirituality coupled with a commitment to being of service to healing, to being of service to love and holding true to the power of love.

What does this actually mean?

In my life it means being an empath and showing up to hold space in the best ways I know how for love to come in and work it’s magic like mist pervading the air and gently seeping into all the crevices, healing as it goes.

It means having my first out of body experience at age four, it means praying in the church pews long after the other kids have left the Sunday school and being branded as a "weird angel”. It means leaving nursing training eight months in knowing that that form of healing was definitely not for me. It’s about believing in synchronicity and finding the exact amount of money I needed on a windswept beach to pay for my first massage training.

It’s about working with a gifted aromatherapist who took the form of a combatant dressed in purple. It means falling in love with a spiritual master knowing only that there was no way out and I had to follow my heart and journey to India with my 6 month old daughter trusting in my own knowingness. The knowingness that was strongest during her home birthing and has remained with me and been strengthened with every act of devotion to truth..

It is these acts of devotion I use and draw upon in my work.

And then there are the trainings (formal and informal) Psychic Massage, NLP, Social Artistry Facilitator Training, Feminine Power, Advanced Specialised Kinesiology, Face Diagnosis, Anatomy and Physiology, Emotional Freedom Technique, Circle of Excellence business trainings, Enlightenment Intensive meditation trainings, Doula (both death and life) trainings and informal Clown school.

The list goes on, the lifelong learning goes on, and the commitment to being of service and to kindle heaven on earth is always with me.

So am I qualified? YES and have achieved countless deeep and lasting transformations for my 1000’s of clients whom I wish to thank for teaching me about myself through them and their lives and stories I have had the privilege to hold space for..

We are One, we are Nature, and I thank you. 🙏🏼